1.4 - ALL THE BIRTHDAYS ALL THE TIME

So here's like, another chapter of this thing. What else am I supposed to say?

Dusk: 'Uncontrollable... nerve twitches. Full-body... tingling.'

'I can't see my hands! This is completely terrifying!'

That's an invisibility cloak, Harry! Not really. I should really remove Poppy's teen-enabled maternity clothes. :/

'I'm Nurturing. Because I now know how it feels to have all your nightmares come at once.'

Aww sweetheart, smile! I need a good photo of you, because you're our new heiress! Yup, if you hadn't guessed already, I've had Dusk lined up for it practically since she was born. Maybe I'll hold heir polls for other generations, but Dusk is by far the best mix of her parents, (and the cutest), compared to her clone brothers. So she just seemed like the best choice.

'My underperformance has eluded me an inglorious title of societal expectation and superficial privilege! Oh, rapture.'

(He's secretly bitter.)

'Well Cletus, without the adherences of heirship, I uh, don't really have to have standards. Wanna hook up?'

'Yeah, why not. Feels good man.'

Red and blue, they are so cute. Even if Cletus does look a bit too much like his daddy.

Cletus' Father's Face: 'Mmm boy, get in dere.'

'Wait Phoenix, just hold this a minute. I can't do this for you.'

'What? I was on a roll there, don't you see the creeper hand? Wait, I-'

'Oh no. You did not just do that. I did not just get that pop-up, Cletus.'

'I'm so sorry, Phoenix.'

'How could you do this to me? First Ashley and now you.'

'I'm sorry Phoenix, I guess I'm just like the rest of the townies. An insatiable manwhore.'

Cletus' Father: 'I got a better view.' :D

'And 'DANA'? I thought you were into guys? What's your game, man?'

'Yeah uh, it's a he. Dana was born during one of the name generator's 'gender-confused' fazes.'

'Why, how on earth do I hold all the fucks I give about that?'

Cletus' Father: 'Brb, dying.'

'Ugh, this is why no one wants to date you. You're a self-righteous hipster piece of shit, who thinks his shitty Skrillex hairstyle is cool.'

'Oh, you did NOT just go there. You did not just go for the hair.'

'Dammit, I'm SORRY. I'm saying so much shit with this mourning moodlet.'

'Whoa, what? Mourning moodlet?'

'He must have died off lot... *sniffle* ...the camera didn't jump to him.'

'Oh, uh. Whoa. This makes me want a committed relationship.'

'Look, I'm still mad at you. But let's put that aside just for now.'

'Flowers, to alleviate your grief?'

'EHMAGAWD, FLAHWERS.'

'So hot stuff, you married?'

'Oh my God, Cletus...'

I let them spend a night under the stars, being cute. Since anyway, Phoenix will be a YA soon, so he can do what he wants.

'Wow man, sudden euphoria! That stuff worked quick!'

Yeah uh, that's not it exactly...

'Oh man, my butt hasn't hurt this bad, since I got it kicked by the burglar. Whas going on?'

'Oh dude, where did these sweet overalls come from? Check it out.'

We'll just let him be.

I think he looks both dapper and cute. And sort of like he's about to start a cult.

'Why is Charles Manson eating waffles at the breakfast table? This is completely terrifying.'

Cute Sims reacting. Addiction is a powerful thing.

'Yes. Behind my tinted eyeshield and colourful rainbow apparel, you will never know that I am staring at your chest, directly and without blinking.'

Unknown Guy: 'Why is this creepy teenage boy macking on my girlfriend? Where am I?'

S'gotta be a party, man.

'Colour me unimpressed with your frivolous display of social convention.'

Hush up, and be glad that you don't have to be one of the people eating cake for the next three weeks.

'You're right. I'm getting out of here! This is great!'

'Yay, brother.'

And in this picture you will see such a rare thing, as the two gloomiest Sims in the house, not looking pissed off or terrified. Golly gosh.

'Doing it right. Watch and learn, commoners.'

Um, wow. He's half-way dressed himself.

Dusk: 'Oh my God. That is so, so, scary. I am so scared.'

There you go. Now be off with ye!

Dusk: 'You just stripped him down, and re-dressed him in front of us. That was terrifying on so many levels.'

Yet the girl who's scared of birthdays, kisses her boyfriend in front of a crowd of her family and friends.

'THE QUICKER THIS HAPPENS, THE BETTER.'

Oh, true.

'So Moses, we're both legal and everything now, so will you be my boyfriend?'

'Of course, Dusk. You'd probably have a cardiac arrest if I said "No", anyway, haha.'

'Yes, yes I would. I'm so glad you understand, Moses.' :)

DAMMIT KRISTEN.

THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO WHIP YOUR HOMEWORK OUT OF YOUR ASS GODAMMIT.

Kristen: 'YOLO.'

So uh.

This is the next shot I took.

Gryffindor: 'QUIET I'M BEING THE SPECIAL BOY.'

'HOLY CRAP I CAN SEE GET THIS SHIT OUTTA MY EYES.'

Hello cutie. Not that you look anything different to your daddy.

'Better.'

He will go places. Places with padded walls.

Oh, and the Cowplant died. Not that anyone knew there was a Cowplant up here, since it never put out cake or anything like a goddamn pansy. R.I.P useless Cowplant.

'There's a tingling spreading from my nether regions, so I guess it's my turn, right?'

'Please don't do that, Mum. It's scary, I don't like it.'

'WHERE THE CATS AT?'

She did it anyway, and it was sort of scary.

'Daddy! Can we have a talk?'

'Oh my word, dude. It's finally happened. Nature is communing back to me. Like, dude.'

'Stay calm, Fabian. You've practiced for this, man.'

'Uh, Dad?'

'Dad, can I have a party? It's my birthday today, and I really want Moses to see me all grown up!'

'SSOOOOSSHH FWSSHHH.'

'Dad, oh... please tell me you're not doing this again.'

'HUSHSHAHSHHHH'

'Anyway, if you're high enough to be speaking tree, you're high enough to agree to this. So birthday party, right?'

'SOOOOSHAAAAFWSHHH;

'Okay, that's a yes!'

'Thanks Daddy! I love you!'

'NSSSHHHHHUUHAAAHHH'

And there was the party. And Dusk played guitar to entertain the guests.

And here newly-adultified boyfriend, Moses, turned up.

And of course, there was the synchronised crotch kicking. Who could forget that.

And for someone who's afraid of birthdays, Dusk looked pretty happy.

'HAH, you're about to be gorgeous. That's hilarious!'

Make a wish, heiress.

'I wish for... a really shitty cliffhanger.'

Wish granted!