'Sorry, uh. Can I call you back later?'
'I'm sorry, I thought we agreed to stop at three children for this generation?'
We did. D:
'Cause that ain't labour pain.
'Oh. Oh dear.'
'Tell my family... that I'm ashamed of them.'
Oopsie.
'Hey there you hot mess - oh.'
'GAAY.'
'Real sensitive, man.'
'Dusk Hex! I commit thee spirit to the underworld, at which you may purchase tapes of the dirty things I do to your husband at your nearest video store, under the franchise 'Death and the Shota'. Now be banished, for eternity!'
'But before you go, check out dat ass. Mmhm.'
And thus was the death of Dusk Hex.
'Excuse me Mr., but do you have park consent for this?'
'Are you fucking...'
'What is with this guy?'
'KIDDING ME.'
'Um sir, I asked a simple question.'
'I'LL LET YOU KNOW THAT I'M THE GRIM REAPER AND...'
And then he proceeded to have the underworld version of That Rant, and pulled some rubbish out of his ass to drop on the ground. What a dick move
R.I.P. Dusk Hex, you went early, but completed your L.T.W. in good time and left me a nice little grave.
Back at the house, things had begun to fall apart in the wake of the demise of their beloved matriarch.
'IT CAN'T BE! THE CRUEL HAND OF FATE HATH TAKEN OUR MASSAGE CHAIR FROM US.'
Sigh.
'What's that punk kid doin' here? I'm gonna step on his face if he's still blockin' the steps when I come back.'
IDK. There are a lot of creepy-looking vampire kids running about, thanks to weird Bridgeport genetics.
'Well I want him outta tha yard so I can have an emotional breakdown.'
'YES. CRY. IT PLEASES ME TO SEE YOUR MENTAL VULNERABILITIES.'
It pleases me to check you off the mental marriageable list.
'MAMAAA.'
Poor girl. Now get back indoors.
Moses, where are you going in that adorkable little buggy so late at night?
'Well, uh, according to the next few photos, I'm going to the science lab.'
What for?
'I uh, don't know. Something to do with uh, all the odious sound effects coming from the inside of this rabbit hole, maybe?'
Oh, right. And then missed the shot of him taking a swig.
'I'm feeling...'
'EXTREMELY CONSTIPATED...'
'BATS UP IN MA FACE, BITCH.'
Some captions are just worth a moment of OOC for.
'I feel, uh... fine.'
'OH, MY BELOVED WIFE.'
Good to know that you'll get upset about her, now that the chair's fixed.
'Is that bitch uh, ever gonna get us to the damn station already?'
Oh yeah, TT pranked the school and got caught.
Police Officer: 'But I must... WALL.'
Of course you must.
'I don't care if you're completely, uh, washed up and old, you'll always, um, be a star to me.'
'The biggest on the earth, uh, in my eyes.'
'Oh Moses! You're the first person to accept me for who I truly am.'
'Hehe... boobs.'
Now that Dusk is dead, I can schmooze other celebrities for points without reparations. No apologies.
Snooki also decided to grow up that night.
'I'm going to become a man now.' :D
'BEHOLD, manliness.'
Just give it a minute. Intermission to watch said manly-man's father smooching up another woman days after his mother's death is go.
*elevator music playing*
There we go. Pretty cute, but he could have been a better mix. So you know what that means...
''It means it's uh, time to celebrate my rugged looks, right?'
Oh dear. Middle-age really hit you hard, huh?
TT: 'Ha, you're old.'
Dusk! How 'bout some ghostly birthday sex to cheer up your old husband, uh?
'What a majestic steed...'
'Oh. My husband. Yes, I like him. Hello there, husband.'
'Yes, good.'
'I can't um, get to the sex because there's uh, a ghost in my bed.'
DFHTHFHG WHY DO YOU HAVE TO MAKE YOUR SEX LIVES SO DIFFICULT.
'Sorry, I've uh, never kissed a ghost before.'
'What? You'd rather kiss a living girl? Is that what you're saying?!'
'No, no , uh-'
'Are you sure? This is very-'
'MMPH'
'Oh Moses, it's just like I remember. Take me, now.'
By the looks of that hand, he's already halfway there. :/
'No, no. That's uh, not how you do it. Try coming in from the other side.'
'Funny how it's usually me saying that to you, dear.'
So Moses never got his ghostly birthday sex.
There were, however two other household members that DID get lucky. Expect kittens. :D
A couple of days later, a birthday party was thrown for Tiger Tiger. Her siblings came, along with a couple of uninvited guests who turn up whenever they want, and always for the free booze.
'Don't expect me to ever change out of this nightgown, either.'
The family then proceeded to assemble for a synchronised ghost gross-out. Clearly, the Illuminati is at work here.
Nevertheless, we will try to make things work between these two again. 'Cause Moses gotta want to WooHoo that won't go away.
In the shower that is, because apparently watery ghost sex is more permeable than regular ghost sex. Such is Sim life.
And of course his daughter would grow up while Moses was getting some, at least with his wife this time. Although infidelity is probably a lot less immoral than necrophilia for that matter.
'Um, who cares. I'm not done gettin' hot.'
'Seriously though, uh, what's wit all the bats and shit?'
AND NOW FOR: shittycliffhanger.exe
Goodnight everybody.
